One of my blog readers asked me if I would try to go without the internet for 24 hours for a NEW THING TO DO. I accepted the challenge. This will NOT be easy.
I could not have done this without group therapy. Press play and see how YOU TOO can get the help you need to survive 24 hours with NO internet.
(I will then post a video when I have succeeded to show what it was like called “how I survived 24 hours off-line”)
This is Judie and Neil Barkan. I met them in my building when I was living in Atlanta last year. I met Neil when I was in the elevator and it was around x-mas and he just kept shaking his head. I asked him what was wrong so close to x-mas? He said his 40 year old son had just unexpectedly passed away in his sleep of a heart attack. They moved from New York to Atlanta for retirement, but mostly to be near their only son and their grandchildren. Now plans had suddenly changed. My heart broke for him. I decided that as long as I lived there I would be their adopted child. Not that I could ever take the place, but I wanted to be there. From that moment I had meals with them, I brought them flowers on mothers day and fathers day, I hung out by the pool with Neil making bets who could get more tan. He told me stories of his son, of living in New York, of traveling, and of the dream he had of spending his last years near his son and his grandchildren. His dreams were shattered now that his only son Jon had died. As for Judie, well, Judie became the worried Jewish mother I never had. She constantly took interest in my life, and my hosting (designed to sell)…I knew she LOVED “designed to sell”, so I got her and Neil on an episode.They pretended to be ” potential home owners” 
I introduced them to the entire film crew as my ”Atlanta Jewish Parents”. And they really were. When my REAL parents came to town we all had a fabulous dinner. When I had to finally move back to L.A. I knew they would be the people I missed the most. They let me stay with them after my furniture had been moved and I still needed a place to stay before I officially moved. They really looked after me. I loved the way they bantered and said exactly what was on their mind. I loved the fun talks and the real conversations we had. I watched them both try to get through the heartbreak of losing their only son,their only child. Judie hid the pain pretty well, but I noticed that Neil could never fully recover from that loss. Judie had a resilience and reached out for support, but I believe the pain was too much for Neil. No one can ever really know the pain that comes from a parent losing their child. It does not seem fair. His body began to break down. He had hip replacement surgeries, and surgery on his heart. I do not think the doctors could fix a heart that was beyond repair. Judie texted me yesterday that Neil had suddenly dropped to the ground at home after a Dr.’s visit. He did not recover. Then she texted that she will always remember how kind I was to both of them.
Neil passed away this past Monday. His heart had just stopped. Judie said that she felt a peace about it because she believed he just did not want to go on anymore. She had just buried Neil next to his son back in New Jersey. Judie wanted to know how I was and what was going on in my life. Suddenly my life, my career, and doing “new things” did not seem important. It is typical Judie to have this happen and still ask about my life. Today I am really sad, and just need to spend a day remembering. Remembering all the people who have lost someone so important to them, that they never fully recover. Remembering to say a prayer for them. Remembering that life is so precious. Remembering all the people we do love. Remembering to tell them. Remembering strong resilient spirits like Judy. Remembering how powerful connection is. And remembering to remember.
Sorry there is no video today. Just images playing in my mind of good times I had with 2 people who I Love dearly, and remembering Neil.
